Reconnecting with an Ex During the Holidays

It’s common to feel sentimental and nostalgic during the holidays, reminiscing about past good times with ex-spouses and in-laws. The temptation to rekindle old flames or explore the possibility of starting anew can be strong. This phenomenon even has a name: Marleying.

Named after Jacob Marley, the ghost who revisits Scrooge in Charles Dickens’ “A Christmas Carol,” Marleying describes exes reconnecting after a prolonged period of no contact. According to a survey by dating site eHarmony, 11% of singles have experienced Marleying, with 8% admitting to initiating contact with an ex. Interestingly, Christmas Eve is identified as the date when people are most likely to receive a text from an ex.

Loneliness during the holidays, especially among singles, contributes to this trend. Nostalgic reflections may focus solely on the positive aspects of past relationships, overshadowing or even forgetting the negatives.

Before reaching out to an ex, Bumble suggests asking the following questions:

Have the reasons or circumstances that led to the breakup changed?
Would a reunion bring short-term gain but long-term pain for you or your ex?

If the reasons for the breakup have evolved, reaching out may be worth considering. However, it’s crucial to be cautious about reopening old wounds. Clearly communicate your intentions, and if mutual feelings exist, a holiday meetup could lead to a rekindled connection.

Nevertheless, entering such encounters with the expectation of reigniting romance may not be wise. Instead, appreciate the opportunity for a brief reunion with someone who was once a significant part of your life.

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